I am a Newlywed Moron

I’ve locked myself out of the house at least 5 times in the last 6 months.

I set my alarm to wake up and fix him breakfast,

but instead sleep an extra 20 minutes.

I forget about the laundry and leave it in the washing machine for days on end.

Sometimes our fridge gets so low we only have cheese and milk. :P

And cookies. There is a constant supply of cookies.

I have no idea about the first steps for buying a house. Other than I want one.

I often forget to take the time to provide my spouse with assurance and affection.

I suuucccckkkkkkk at organizing bills.

Laura and Ray

I am a total newlywed moron.

Ray? Ray on the other hand is an absolute pro.

He fixes our cars.

And by fixes, I mean he’s in the driveway lying on his back with his hands underneath.

Not he ‘drives it to the dealership’ for them to fix it.

He makes sure we I don’t overspend.

He forces me to stop the business of my to-do list to spend quality time together.

He cleans up after I cook.

He always remembers to talk with me about decisions – not just the big ones.

Because big or small they’re going to affect us both.

He’s a team player.

He keeps me laughing after a crazy day at work and reminds me that I’m more than a 9-5 desk job.

Ray is the coolest person on the planet.

I told someone last week “We’re kinda at that point in life where we’re like ‘we have no idea what we’re doing’ ..”

and his response was “stay that way for as long as you can”

Because it means you get to have fun.

You don’t have to worry about kids. Or retirement. or [major] health bills. You get to love being in love. 

Ray and I get the question all the time “So how is married life?” Fa-reaking-sweet.

Life is fun, but sharing life with Ray is even better.

I read this article earlier today, and loved the thought process behind it.

Imagine looking forward to discussing anything and everything with my wife because she actually helps me make better decisions that ultimately transform my life into more than the selfish pile of crap it was before her. Crazy, I know.

Here’s my challenge to the real men out there; it’s very simple. If you have a good marriage, talk about it. If you love your wife, say it. If some moron tells you that you’re merely a “newlywed” or that you’re still just “too young to understand,” correct them. Openhanded slaps to the face are preferable.

Unless those of us who love our wives [and husbands!] (and thus, our lives) make a conscious change to the way we speak of them, unless we begin choosing to elevate and praise our spouses instead of denigrate, we will be letting an incredibly corrosive self-perpetuating societal meme destroy the very institution that defines our lives.

Steven Crowder       Full article here

So here’s to you, darling.

You are the bees knees.


6 thoughts on “I am a Newlywed Moron

  1. well, i just read this & loved it. you’re so quirky! AND i’m just like you when it comes to those things and here’s matt all good and such. & that article, that is how i imagine matt & even what he does, his friends complain all the time bout there lady & here he is telling them how good i am. anyways. i love you two, i love the thought of you two married, i love the reality of you two being married, & i will always love y’alls relationship!!!!

  2. I totally can relate. I’m definitely a newlywed moron too. It’s definitely a growing phase I think we all get to go through. Though I must say, I am relieved I’m not the only one who forgets about laundry and leaves it in the machine for days.

  3. I’ve been married 10 years now and I still forget the silliest things. I can make a post it note to remind me to do something the next day. I’ll take the note with me in the morning but Lord only knows where it ends up because half the time I’ve lost it and have to make a new list. Stephen & I are all about sharing duties and keeping each other on track. Usually if one of us gets slack the other picks up. And a lot of times we just let things go because as Ray says – we’re more than a 9-5 job – it’s ok that the house isn’t spic-n-span clean – it’s lived in – plus we never have guests over :) Shame but we don’t. Wishing you guys a LONG and Happy marriage
    Loves Ya – Judy

  4. I love that you accept your faults! I ain’t even married and I do those things, so I can’t even imagine what it will be like when I’m married! Love you Laura, God bless!

  5. Tip for organizing bills – we pay bills every Friday (that way we only have to do it once per week). When we receive the bill we write on the outside when it’s due. Then we stick it in an small holder by due date. Every Friday I’ll pull out everything that has to be paid before the next week. Example – if due date is the 26th I’d have to pay it by the 19th. If due date is 30th I’d have to pay it on the 19th b/c I couldn’t wait until Friday the 26th. You’re basically looking at next week’s Friday and saying if anything is due before 7 days from that pay it. Of course this means you have to have the money in the bank :) but after a while of budgeting and knowing what date the bills come on it gets really easy. Just a thought.

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